06/21/2026
🐾 Buddy's Weekly Update 🐾
I would like everyone to know that I am currently #6 in the local rankings with 8,164 minutes logged this month.
Do I know exactly what these rankings mean? No.
Do I believe I should be #1? Absolutely.
My staff claims I spend most of my time sleeping in the bookstore, supervising from a chair, and judging customers who leave without buying a book. I call that leadership.
This week, however, there was a serious disruption to bookstore operations.
Karen completely lost focus after a bestselling author liked one of our preorder posts.
I am not naming names, but it involved Paris, a lot of excitement, and a suspicious lack of professionalism.
Meanwhile, I climbed to #6 in the local rankings and nobody made a fuss.
While the humans were celebrating literary fame, I remained focused on the important things:
✔ Maintaining bookstore morale
✔ Accepting compliments from customers
✔ Walking 4.71 miles without actually going anywhere
✔ Supervising staff from strategic napping locations
✔ Plotting my rise to #1 in the rankings
✔ Wondering why nobody is preordering books signed by me
Kristin Harmel may have liked a post.
But has she spent 8,164 minutes managing a bookstore?
I rest my case.
As always, thank you for supporting Second Chapter Books. Your purchases help fund my management team, my snacks, and my ongoing campaign against the five cats currently ranked above me.
Respectfully,
Buddy
Assistant Manager of Customer Relations, Napping, Security, and Executive Oversight
