04/22/2026
I did a thing… and bought myself a porch goose 🪿✨ and it was absolutely mandatory that I crochet her this outfit!
HELLOOOOOOO, my dears!
I am Lady Bernadette White-Honkerton, but you can call me Betty. Everyone does eventually, darling.
I’m a mid-30s goose mama who can honk-hop, bebop, strut ‘til ya drop—and still have enough energy to make a wicked cup of cocoa! ☕
I’m equal parts put-together and “figure it out as we go.” Soft when it matters—help is here, my dear—firm when it counts, and just cheeky enough to keep things interesting. I have a porch presence that simply cannot be ignored.
I run this porch with style, sarcasm, a nurturing heart, and just enough “don’t make me honk twice.” Because standards don’t maintain themselves, sweetheart.
And yes… I can give “the look” from across the yard without saying a word.
Now come along, my precious gems, wipe your feet, behave yourselves, and don’t give me a reason to honk.
