03/09/2012
Done with another game of “Age of Empires” you look up and discovered that another 8 hours has just flown by, with nary a care, and for a flickering moment, you consider the fact that you could’ve just been at a job for that long, and actually made money today. Whoa, what a concept!
If only there existed a job like that…..where you could put to use your ruthless efficiency, almost fanatical devotion to …beating your own personal best scores, where you could revel in the thrill of competitive action and bask in the glory of high scores and the rush of flying through the motions. You daydream of a job where you could listen to YOUR music, allegro “action” music, not that drab, sleepy, empty stuff they play over the intercoms in waiting rooms. If you could find like that, you’d WANT to go to work – hey, you’d work 42 hours a week to get paid for that! You consider yourself the kind of person who likes a challenge, if only one existed.
Game on.
Welcome to our company. The work environment is zany, eclectic and rather well-read. This is a drug-free workplace - not including caffeine. ! This is a job where you will be paid according to how hard you bust out work, because you will receive a bonus based on piecework – the faster (and more skilled you are) the more moolah you make. Honesty & teachability is a MUST. Check your ego at the door.
When off the clock, we like to offset the hard work with refreshing fun. Our staff has put together this job ad, based on what THEY think we need to see in new recruits:
- Lightning fast 10-key
- No slackers. No Whiners. No pansies. No drama. No prima donnas.
- If you don’t want to work hard & pull your own weight, go work for the government.
- Competitive nature, self-motivated, strong personal drive.
- Commitment to doing things correctly.
- Doesn’t mind dust & cold.
- You might occasionally break a nail, or bang a shin. You will get dusty. S’all good. You’ve got “work clothes” for that. Warm, sturdy ones.
- Doesn’t mind spending most of your time at a desk, busting the work out with a quickness, punctuated by occasional leaping from the chair to do some heavy lifting.
- Computer savvy.
- Can speedily evaluate things visually without getting hung up on too much detail.
- Can spot efficiencies a mile away – always trying to be more efficient.
- Not hip to cutting corners. Play by the rules – win by the rules.
- Not into workplace politics – just get the job done, and personal satisfaction from a job well done.
- You’d rather just get through your job & have your social life later.
- Maybe you’re just a little uptight…..at least your friends think so, but you just want to get things right.
- You don’t back down from a challenge. But you know how to manage yourself so you don’t burn out.
- Can you tune your mind out and just go into “autopilot” and watch your hands fly?
- Oh, yeah, did we mention the dust?
- Sometimes the warehouse gets a little messy – will this bother your OCD?
- Able to heft heavy boxes regularly – enjoys the anaerobic exercise & weightlifting challenge.
- Doesn’t shy away from hard, unglamorous work. BUT the free books are a perk!
- You pull your self up by your bootstraps and tell yourself to “suck it up” or “walk it off”. You don’t tolerate fussiness in yourself and abhor it in others.
- No nonsense. There’s a reason why they call it “work”, and you prefer it that way.
- Satisfaction in knowing that you get paid MORE the harder you work – some measure of control over your wage – it’s up to you!
If this sounds like you, we want to run you through our interview gauntlet Bring it on.
Bring your resume & letters of reference to:
Once Sold Tales
22442 72nd Ave. S.
Kent, WA 98032
(253) 833-1911
Open: Monday - Saturday 10am - 9pm
Sunday Noon - 6pm
http://www.oncesoldtales.com
