01/18/2026
Relationship Perspectives
Dr. Rob Deck
Ed. D. Harvard University
M. Ed. University of Florida
Best-Selling Author & Communications Counselor
As his driver slowly meandered around the corner and the car crept toward the door of the posh boutique where his very first book signing was to be held, she pointed to the line of eager females standing outside in the cold Jersey air that early February evening, and how so many of them seemed to be dragging their significant other along for the event.
Being his first major signing event in what quickly became a life-changing whirlwind, he was slightly naive in thinking that these people he’d never met before were surely in line for something else, a new PS5 perhaps? It wasn’t until he noticed that they were grasping copies of his book Wordgasm that it became a shocking reality. All of the money the publishing company paid for market research determined that the targeted demograph purchasing his book would be males ages 18-45, looking to understand the desires of females.
We hope they got a refund.
What he learned that day, and in the 150+ book signings, speaking events, lectures, radio shows, and reader responses to follow, was that men don’t want to hear what women have to say… at least in the way they communicate their needs.
What we men really want is the Mr. Fix-It approach- or the quickest way from point A to point B.
It turned out that the audience his book attracted was not males looking to better themselves, but females who agreed with the words in the book, and needed the world to hear those words. The audience was mostly attractive, youthful, educated, females who were not getting the reciprocation they deserve in their current, or previous relationships. 11 years later, Rob Deck listened to what they had to say, and the result has been mind-blowing.
In the following article Deck answers some of the questions our readers have.
Recently, a reader said he took the Wordgasm approach, and has made it his standard on how to treat women, but still continues to get stepped on while all the D-Bags get the girls. He asked if I had any "off the record" advice, and I decided it should be "on the record" for everyone to hear.
I told him to practice 3 things that will change him. It's not about changing women, or becoming someone different in order to attract girls that are not deserving of your love. You see, when you love someone, you are giving them part of yourself. If you're giving them a facade, you are failing both them and yourself. If you give them a part of you, and they treat it like dirt, all you can do is hope it was worth the time you did have. Here are the 3 things I asked him to try:
1) Painful Honesty
2) Fierce Loyalty
3) Pornographic Self Discovery ... Bear with me on this one...
-Painful Honesty. The sharp, pointy part of love. The part that cuts out the cancerous growths that eventually kill romance... When you cut out the cancer, it hurts... but it eventually heals, and saves the life of your relationship. How painful? There is no limit. Be honest not only with her, and not only about every little thing, but with yourself as well. Never see yourself for something that you are not, and never see yourself for less than you are.
-Fierce Loyalty. I have a saying, "Why would I check out a Toyota when I have a Lamborghini at home?". Fact of the matter is, women aren't competing with you, they're competing against every other girl out there. You are just a pawn. So, when you and your partner are happy, that's when all the girls come out that were nowhere to be found when you were single. Think about it, you know it's true. There's a reason for that, it's not because you became a stud overnight, trust me. Be loyal, not as a challenge to your relationship, but as a challenge to your own character. Relationships are war, and they take fighting for. Are you man enough to be loyal? Fight temptation? If not, it's time you stop being a little bitch and man up. Treat her the way you would want your daughter to be treated. Loyalty is respect.
-Pornographic Self Discovery. It is exactly how it sounds. Get down and dirty, not freaky or blow-up sheep stuff, but pure naked vulnerability with yourself mentally (not physically, please). See who you are when no one is looking. Find out your character, and who you are as a man. If you don't know who you are, and what you have to offer, you'll never be secure, and you'll never be able to love, because you won't know who you deserve, or who deserves you. Look in the mirror, see who you are, and that is who you are giving to her...
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