05/30/2026
What an emotional few days it's been. It's like the flood gates have been opened lol. I've spent the last 2.5 years of my life, numbing every emotion by staying hyper focused on school and work. I guess subconsciously I thought that if I stopped long enough to "feel," I may lose my footing and fail at getting this Masters Degree. So, I pushed down A LOT (including some grieving that needed to be done) and just kept going.
That changed last night.
I had my last class on Zoom. We were asked to create an art project of some kind, related to our experience during the Masters program.
I had the bright idea to make a poem which was a letter to my Grandpa, along with an AI created photo of him and I together at the graduation I won't be attending this weekend (it's in Nebraska and I'm saving my PTO days for our vacation this fall).
Anyhow, I had to read this poem/letter in front of my class and professor with the picture of me and Grandpa on the screen. I was crying before I even started reading. When I finished and looked up, I wasn't the only one sobbing.
It's been soooooooooo long since I've allowed myself to emotionally crash out like that. And today... I was so mentally exhausted and fatigued from feeling all the feels. I took PTO for the second half of my day because I knew I wasn't any good to my clients when I was feeling the way I was.
I came home, slept, and woke up to Chad ready to make me cry all over again. He handed me a big box from Kay's and said, "This is from me and Peepaw."
S**t.
Here we go again.
Crying like a baby.
He has celebrated my academic achievements with jewelry each time and it means a lot to me ❤️ I am surprised we made it through these past few years. It definitely wasn't easy and there is probably some repairing that needs done... He is my person and I know we got this. If we haven't let anything else destroy us- why start now?
Thank you, husband. I love you.
Thank you, Peepaw. You're missed every single day and I look forward to the day I get to see you again. I know you are up there having a coffee date and bragging to all the angels right now!
