Rolling Acres Mall - Unofficial

02/14/2026

Michael is attending too… a situation… which arose from a separate situation… and created a new situation.

Nailed it
Carl

02/09/2026

We successfully got the game back on in the JCPenney court. We apologize that no one got to see the half time shows. We hope you all enjoyed Carls performance with his triangle while we went to find Henry and got him to plug the Ethernet cables back in.
Management

12/25/2025

(Loosely based on an event that took place today)

12:00 Noon on Christmas Eve. You’re on your way to the mall to do some last minute Christmas shopping and to spend time with your best friend you haven’t seen for eight months.

As you turned off of Romig Road into the main parking lot entrance a man in a wheel chair, all bundled up, and cold sits with a sign asking for help. The parking lot is extremely packed with cars but you manage to find a spot near Sears. The store is extremely busy, nobody quite knows why this particular Sears location does so well while so many others have shut down, but the employees are grateful.

You and your best friend meet in the Court of 12 Trees by the orange fountain. Surprisingly it’s running this year and Santa isn’t on it. You both decide to head down toward Friendly’s in the Macy’s wing of the mall. As you pass through the Court of Aquarius you see Santa has been moved down to the lower level this year in front of JCPenney. It was different but still kind of neat. After eating at Friendly’s you both go downstairs to the Cinema to catch a special screening of “Home Alone”.

It’s now 4:30 PM and the mall will be closing in thirty minutes. As you go to leave you notice the gentleman in the wheel chair is still on the corner. You happen to have a takeout container of French fries left over from the restaurant. You abruptly park the car and get out. Making your way to the man you hear Santa say “No one should go hungry on Christmas Eve” you look around and don’t see anybody. Ordinarily something like that would be horrifying but you feel warm instead. There have been several stories involving Santa at the mall over the years.

You approach the man and hand him the container. He opens it cautiously and then smiles when he sees the fries. “Merry Christmas” you tell him as you walk back to your car. A family Christmas Eve dinner awaits you.

Merry Christmas to you and yours from the Rolling Acres Mall Unofficial Management

11/27/2025

Make sure to stop by for a free Thanksgiving dinner in the Picnic Place and a chance to shoot rotten watermelons that Carl claimed he was eating but really ate more chocolate!!!!!!
Management

10/22/2025

We can’t find Carl, think he got scared and ran away. Aunty Karen can’t be too far behind.

09/30/2025

We do apologize for the horrific events of yesterday, and we would like to offer counseling to anyone who needs it. A disgruntled custodian gave the t-shirt cannon to Henry during our “Don’t Swim in the Fountain Event” and let’s just say some dings got donged.
Management

09/05/2025

Our newest showcase from your Rolling Acres Mall Sears store!!! Upgrade your home to the 21st Century with this stylish TV and additional VCR. Get rid of that flimsy flat screen TV and invest in a new entertainment center GUARANTEED TO LAST!!!!!
Management

07/05/2025

Ya'll why has it been so hot outside? I snuck up to the roof to eat my chocolate which immediately melted and it felt like the devil farted in my face!!!!

On an unrelated note, the employees of Aladdin's Castle might want to get a bunch of buckets, an awesome maintenance worker (not me) accidentally spilled melted chocolate on an air conditioner and the ceiling is probably going to start raining, again some other maintenance worker, not me.
Carl

06/17/2025

Carl would join you guys, provided you give him chocolate. Vivian on the other hand…
Management

Summer Vacation! Time to take a dip in the fountain before Carl finds us!
-Junior

02/22/2025

A very misinformed manager left this on the Sears doors. We would like assure you all that the store is still open for business.
Management