13/12/2025
THAT MYSTERIOUS DASH
(Before Resting in Peace)
By Gener P. Valerio
From his book " My Breathing Space", pages 100 - 101. Copyright 2006
Next week is November already. A long holiday is in the offing again. Filipinos will gather once more in the cemeteries and memorial parks to visit their departed loved ones. That included our families since our father and mother died. Though we believe they're somewhere else (and I'm pretty sure they are), we use this rare time to meet up with each other again. I mean, my brother and sisters and other relatives. Wrong motive?
It is this time of the year that I get to see a lot of tombs and tombstones (when else?) But even during non-All Saints Day when I would roam around any memorial park, I get instantly curious about the age of the deceased when he or she died.
Of course the answer is freely given away by the difference between the date of birth and the date of death. All it needs is simple subtraction.
The whole lifetime of any person dead or living is manifested by just a tiny line between those two dates --- the dash.
The very dash can be a day, a month or a hundred year. It doesn't matter. The question is: How useful has that dash been?
Many times I ask myself: How have I been living my dash? Now that I have reached (being in my early forties) the so called mid-life, I am kind of panicky like nothing.
Going over the details of my life for the last forty years simply give goose bumps all over my carnal and mortal body.
Have I done more than good than bad?
Have I touched more people's lives favorably than the other way around? Have I lived up to the expectations of my family and friends? A lot of questions that at the end did not make me feel good. Because if it were an exam, I could have easily failed.
At the end of the day ( i.e. at the time that we will go for good) only my Creator will judge me accordingly. His standards are so far the highest of all standards but His faithful and merciful heart is also the best that their is.
I cannot forget the lesson brought to me by this quotation:
"We make a living out of what we get. We make a life out of what we give."
And I will always live up to my resolve to be the best that I can be, no matter what weaknesses or inadequacies I may have. I may have faltered a lot of times ( I cannot keep track with my counting anymore), I tried to get up ten times more.
And this makes me feel good again.
The next time I see those "mysterious dashes" I know each one is unique and has a special story to tell. And I won't be afraid. I'm still alive, I can still nurture and polish my own DASH.
I've learned that to live a creative life, we must forget our fear of being wrong.
Gener P. Valerio
Oct. 26, 1960 - Dec 14, 2012
This article is being shared by Gard V. Calub to honor Gener's 13th Death Anniversary.
