25/11/2025
WHAT CHILDREN DON’T TELL US…
1. Don’t shout at me.
When you raise your voice, I get scared. I start thinking that if you’re yelling at me, something must be wrong with me.
2. Listen to me.
When I tell you about things that matter to me, look into my eyes. It makes me feel that I — and my little world — are important to you.
3. Let me grow at my own pace.
Don’t push me into things I’m not ready for. Remember, I’m a child, and I learn best by playing and exploring.
4. I love when you spend time with me.
When you’re in a good mood, laugh with me, play with me — we create memories I’ll carry into adulthood.
5. Don’t compare me to siblings or other kids.
It makes me feel “less,” and I need your acceptance more than anything.
6. Hold me when I’m sad.
Let me cry. Don’t tell me boys don’t cry or that I’m being too dramatic. My feelings are real — just like yours.
7. Teach me how to care for myself.
Rest, sleep, have your hobbies, meet your friends. Show me that being a parent can bring joy. It hurts me to see you exhausted, angry, or sacrificing everything for me — it makes me worry that it’s my fault.
8. Stay close when I’m scared.
Don’t laugh at my childhood fears. Tell me you were once afraid of the dark too, and let me keep a flashlight by my pillow.
9. Love me simply because I exist.
Not because I run fast, say poems, or behave perfectly. Love me even when I make mistakes — I need to know your love doesn’t disappear when I fail.
10. Show love to your partner.
From you, I learn how to handle conflict, face difficulties, and understand what real love looks like.
11. Remember that I will likely adopt your beliefs — about myself, about others, and about life.
Think about whether these beliefs are true and whether they will help me. If you believe the world is dangerous and people are bad, I may grow up fearful and distrustful.
12. I know you love me and try your best.
Show me that bad days and small failures are normal. Learn from them, take care of yourself, and forgive yourself — and I’ll learn to do the same.
13. Smile at me.
Your genuine smile soothes me. It makes me feel safe. It makes me feel loved.
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