23/08/2026
I’ve always preferred to be an observer, taking things in, never wanting to be the focus. I’ve been scared to try new things. This summer I’ve made a huge effort, moving out of my comfort zone to try things that I always thought were ‘too hard’.
This weekend has been my biggest challenge. My 8 year old really wanted to go camping, but the practicalities (kit, traipsing across a field in the night for a wee, the unknown etc) have always been too much of a barrier.
This weekend I bit the bullet & we went to a Mini Fest. It was completely fantastic! We did need to traipse across the field in the night for a wee - but the stars were incredible! We tried so many things - quality family time together with no need for screens. The cliché of making memories together firmly ticked.
Last night really made me think. I love to dance (at the back) & my son LOVES to dance -with none of my self consciousness! The band were fab. We began dancing together at the back, but he wanted to be closer to the stage. A few minutes later he was at the very front, fully immersed in the music & wanting me to join him from the side. I didn’t want to let him down, so I did. Sounds simple but felt huge. There I was, crazy dancing, front & centre - something I’ve never done before. As the set continued & no one was staring or mocking me (as per my critical inner voice) I relaxed & started to enjoy myself (no photos exist of this as we were completely in the moment). The best bit though? Seeing my son beam as we danced together. That is imprinted on my brain & in my heart ♥️
I couldn’t get back to sleep after my nighttime wander/ star gazing experience. My brain was buzzing with how much we are constrained by worry, feeling scared or our inner voice. What happens if we stop listening to them - even briefly?
A woman much wiser than me recently told me “nothing changes if nothing changes Caroline”. Lots of things feel like they’ve changed this summer. I still don’t want to be the focus, but I can do things that feel hard; I can push myself out of my comfort zone & I don’t have to listen to my inner critic quite so strongly.
Maybe that’s true for all of us?
Imagine how life could be…