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Melissa Explains It All, 1700 N Claiborne, New Orleans, LA (2026)

09/02/2021

Mom's Log:
FIRST of all, f**k you hurricane Ida, off top. You raggedy yuck mouth ho.

So I had reached the "now or never" point in my freezer and i was oh so delighted that I had some soup for these boys that I made a few weeks back.
I put the freezer ziplock bag in a very regular dollar tree glass on top of the grate from my air fryer, on top of a candle. It was like 40% defrosted when I started but every 8-10 minutes I'd go shake the bag up and put it back in the glass. I had rice in them 90 second microwave bowls so when I felt like the soup was hot hot, I added some rice and put it back to heat the rice in it too. They loved it and I was so happy we could make something shake for dinner out here in Ida land with no power.
It was what I called TLC soup, (tomato, leek, and crab) and we sho needed it that night. Bellies got full and sleep came right along with em. (I didn't share my wine with them, they are very wasteful😒, but that didn't hurt either, fa me🤷🏽‍♀️🍷💤)
I included some clearer photos from when I first cooked it so y'all know it was real.

It also works without the ziplock bag, I tried it with a can of regular soup in the glass the next night and it went just fine also.

I hope this helps. We in it together y'all. ?💁🏽‍♀️👩🏽‍🍳😋

08/01/2021

On this here Scavenger Saturday, the stuff in the fridge made chicken fajita pasta and it was a hit! They all ate it up! 😋😋💜💚💛

07/29/2021

If you are a woman and either planning to lease with 1st Lake or currently leasing an apartment with them, please pay attention to what has happened to me. It could mean your life.

We had many problems with our apartment and the office staff's negligence, but the scariest thing by far was a maintenance man they allowed to stalk me. If a maintenance man makes you uncomfortable around him, please be mindful of that feeling because you could end up in a situation like mine.

It started with the blank stares and uncomfortable lingering and I tried to convince myself that maybe he was just socially awkward and not dangerous, just so I could be at least somewhat comfortable in the home I was stuck in since my first lease ended in the middle of covid.
Then he has all kinds of personal questions for me that have nothing to do with the flood he just caused in my bathroom by failing to turn the water off before starting.

All of that was very unnerving, but I didn't know I wasn't safe there until I encountered him entering my side door with his office key. I had just gotten out of the shower so I was only in a robe. This creep just stood there and stared when I asked him what he was doing. I told him there's no maintenance here today and quickly closed the door.

Hours later I realized that he had actually left his office copy of our house key in our door. I don't know whether he planned to return later or he planned to copy the key once he was off or what. I just know that my safety and privacy was extremely violated that day and all I could do was keep the key in hopes he couldn't do it again.

I pleaded with the office not to send him back for any further maintenance in my home because of what happened, but they continued to send him and allow him to traumatize me all over again. Each time I just plainly told him that he could tell the office to cancel my request.

At that point I wanted to correspond with whoever was in charge of that entire office because I clearly wasn't being heard by that staff, they just kept blowing me off. From the follow up emails I received from them, it didn't seem like they even read what I sent.

To add insult to injury, I then receive a certified letter in the mail from their superior. This was the nastiest letter I have every gotten from any establishment that called themselves a professional business.

Their regional vice president, Angel Dubreuil, was not only completely ignoring everything that happened, but was accusing me of abusing their maintenance staff. All 5 feet 3 inches of my small frame was obviously intimidating to a man over twice my size.

So basically, this man stalked me, tried to enter my home unannounced, left my home open to himself or whomever else decided to wander in with the key he left in the door, and when I tried to keep him away from me I was threatened with eviction while being accused of berating people I don't even know. Additionally, they sent me a notice of nonrenewal of the lease, as if I intended to continue living there with a stalker on staff that keeps showing up at my house. It started to feel like I was being pranked or something because this couldn't really be happening.

There are really SO many more reasons not to lease with that company, so much more I could say about the horrors of living with 1st Lake, but this is about safety and women need to know that they can be harassed by these men with no recourse and be stuck in a lease while it's happening to you.

I'm not going to sit here and act like renting an apartment in the greater new orleans and surrounding areas isn't almost always a headache and a half. These leases are designed to give us all the short end of the stick while they collect their money. I admit that's not specific to 1st Lake. Anyone who has ever had to rent down here knows that we live in a landlord state, that's no secret. It's a loss we all have to take until we can either leave the area or buy a home. But 1st Lake has taken things to an entirely more threatening level here and I think we can all agree that harassment and stalking shouldn't be something we are just forced to accept.

Protect our women, don't give 1st Lake a chance to them in danger. Go with literally any other company or owner. If you're already stuck in a lease, please be vigilant and stay aware.

07/23/2021

My first baby boy had a Peter Rabbit themed nursery so I took some Whole Foods bags and cut them up to make the garden in his plastic drawers. I just positioned them how I wanted and taped them to the inside of each drawer. My family got him the bunny from build a bear and that blanket was crocheted by my great grandmother so I thought it was a cool way to have her near.

I was probably more excited about all of it than he was but I was proud nonetheless 💁🏽‍♀️☺️🤷🏽‍♀️💛💚💜 🐰🥕🥬

01/13/2021

Y'all knew they talk? If you're from where I'm from, you already knew that means they go together. So act accordingly. And thank me later.😋😋😋

01/05/2021

I've seen a lot of suggestions about what we should all do with our whopping stimulus checks (and way more about what we shouldn't do) but I think the most important and beneficial way any of us can use that money is make it work for us. If you do have the luxury of choosing where to allot those funds in your budget, do your best to be conscious about purchases that will improve your life and maybe take away some stress long term.

What I think we're missing is that its gonna look like something different for every one of us. You gotta really think about your own daily life and where your biggest struggles lie. See if maybe you can get those kids something to play on indoors so they get some of that energy out as well as gtf out yo face for a lil minute. Maybe get you an air fryer so you can save some time and energy on meals (and re-crisp your leftovers too! definitely a game changer, I must say). Actually shell out those few dollars that you never really wanna sacrifice on some kind of closet organization so you aren't getting frustrated and killing your nerves trying to look for everything you need all the time. You can totally utilize more of what you already have when it's easily accessible. A few sets of plastic drawers can change ya life fa real.

And if for you, an easier life requires a $40 lipstick to encourage your smile and revive your face, DO THAT S**T! Buy it and put it on and send me a photo of it so I can applaud you from my living room with "yasssss queen!!" right on top of it. And don't let a soul tell you that you shouldn't. If giving yourself a boost that this money allows you to afford is what you need to improve your daily life, please don't let an ignorant muhf**ka tell you to buy an LLC with it.

11/30/2020

On Kevin Kelly of TRUE Kitchen and Kocktails:

I understand the sentiment, truly I do, but he was ALL the way out of pocket. You NEVER address your guests that way. First of all it's not professional, secondly it's likely not an accurate representation of the person you are normally, and probably most importantly you NEVER want to be captured on film handling yourself so unruly at your place of business so that it can be immortalized by the internet and easily brought up at any future point in your career. He is not at all helping the culture by this display and his brand can not be successful at its original goal if certain doors will be immediately be closed to him just because higher level folks have too much to lose to risk aligning with the foolery.
There are SO many ways that the situation could have been handled that would not have painted him in such an irrational light but he chose the avenue wherein he failed to take any responsibility for the events of the evening. He was the one who failed to plan, so unavoidably planned to fail. What was the logic in having a restaurant with a DJ if dancing is offensive there? Furthermore, what was the intent of having a twerk worthy playlist if one is not to twerk in the establishment? His setup seems so grossly out of the ball park he says he was swinging for but it's those ppl's fault for not seeing his vision? Somebody make it make sense, please.
We all mess up, and sometimes things are overlooked, it's bound to happen. But honestly in his position I would have sat my ass in the back room, bit my tongue, prayed they didn't cause expensive damage, and wrote up all the protocols and appropriate signage to ensure there would not be a repeat of this disaster. I would also be kicking myself for having dusse slushies on the menu and not seeing why these measures should have been taken prior to even opening, but that's just me. (The petty in me would have probably wanted to offer a loud and sincere apology to the other people seated for what they are having to witness and assure them that I have taken every step possible to attempt to convince them to cease this behavior, but drunk hoes tend to fight in these instances and I'm not tryna have them break up all my s**t in there soooo....🙅🏽‍♀️)
Bottom line, he was just as out of his element as he was trying make his customers out to be, if not more so. The old folks shoulda let him know to sweep around his own front door first. Or the younger ones coulda told him to check ya self before ya wreck ya self. Either way, somebody shoulda told him something before they let they mans out there like this here.

This shouldn't be an afterthought but I do believe he supposed to be masked up, and there's a whole HEAP'a ppl in that thang.....aaaaand nobody would have been able to prove any of that if he hadn't made himself a goddamn spectacle.🤦🏽‍♀️

But ppl who twerk when there's a DJ are the ones acting simple...🤷🏽‍♀️okay sir.

08/11/2020

I value it so much during these times when I encounter genuine beauty in the world. Hate seems to be everywhere you look, so when you turn a corner and find hope instead, it's pretty magical. Take a minute today and celebrate your wins and those of the people close to you. Congratulate somebody. It's good for your soul. If ya wanna, you can share with me below and I'll do a little happy jig for ya too!

07/19/2020

On this episode of the Target Chronicles, I found this gem in children's books. But what happened to his old butt tho? Did he lose his butt somehow? Was his butt broken? Is it his drag butt? Was the padding worn out? Where does one purchase a new butt at his age? I have so many questions here.
He probably tried his mama one too many times and she came through on that promise to beat his whole ass off his body. If that's the case, you stay buttless young sir, and think about what you did that made you lose ya ass.

07/18/2020

I don't really like my food to party until it gets where it's going. So I do charcuterie a lil different. Also BBQ shrimp and some toast, because bbq shrimp, ya know? 😋😋😋

It was such a great selection too. Inbox me for the specifics.😉

07/17/2020

I gotta tell y'all bout last night. We ordered from J's Creole Wings and lawd hemmercy!!! These flavors tho... whew chile... every one of was more than legit. That Sriracha lemon pepper packed some power too. It was the first one I ate and I had to get my mind right but it was that gas okay! It ended up being my favorite flavor we got.

I'm really ticky about my wings, but these were just cooked so well throughout and just the right amount of sauce so they were still crispy. And that's especially hard to achieve with delivery.

As far as the fries, I would absolutely love it if they switched to ground rosemary on the fries but other than that, no problem. We loved the fried garlic pieces they tossed in.

I will definitely order from them again. We got sweet heat, Creole rub, Sriracha lemon pepper, and island jerk. The fries were garlic rosemary parmesan. I also have to note the distribution of drums and flappers was just perfect for me. I'm a flapper girl but the mister is about the drums, worked out great.

Thanks you made our night!😋😋😋

https://instagram.com/jscreolewings?igshid=q0ymbziyar63

06/07/2020

Shortly after becoming a single mom, I started dating a guy I had been friends with for years. I don't really remember how it came up, but one day he told me he didn't know if he wanted kids or not, and was leaning towards not. Now since we'd been friends for years he was already cool with my son so I didn't worry that he would mistreat him or anything, but it had me all kinda f**ked up so I checked him on it. Like, why would you get with me if you aren't sure you want kids?🤔🤨😒

He insisted that him not wanting kids of his own didnt mean he wouldnt love my son, but I really wasn't hearing it to be honest. I just couldnt really wrap my head around that concept because if I'm yours, he is yours too, how am I gonna continue a relationship feeling like you might prefer that my kid wasn't around?

I mean ultimately he had the backbone of a jellyfish and couldnt be bothered to get his ceiling fan fixed in his bedroom to make me comfortable so before long I had to let that s**t go, but even if he did wanna act like a grown man I could never have overlooked that one comment.

What say yall? Do you think that as a parent you could be with someone who expressly did not want kids of their own or were on the fence about it?

*sidenote: I may or may not have heard through the grapevine that now he's with a woman who has multiple children and his family (who loved me) is not a fan of her. Life is a funny old broad sometimes.😏😌😂

Melissa Explains It All